Refund Please

Refund Please

Cabrera and Willis? The rumors were flying.
Detroit in the series? I was certainly buying.
A call to Vegas was immediately made.
Lots of bets, sure to win, I was getting paid.

Spring Training came and I thought, let's bet more.
Sheff, Maggs, Cabrera, Guillen a powerful four.
And with a 1-2 punch to get things going
Surely in October, the champagne would be flowing.

And with the pitching addition of Dontrelle Willis
Other teams would be muttering, Detroit's gonna kill us.
Not even a closer with nary a fastball
Would be enough to keep this team from winning it all.

Opening day came, hooray, it's the Royals.
Wait, did they just get swept by the Royals?
And then it happened again, swept by the Sox
Verlander from Cy Young, to merely hurling rocks.

Historians said oh and six, bye bye series
Injuries? Big heads? Many many theories.
They'll come around, just look at those names
So many bound for the hall, they can still play this game.

With the bad start, I wasn't getting worried
The odds are even better, to the ATM I hurried
More and more cash shipped off to the book
Yes, the tigers to win, don't give me that look.

Just two years ago, they were oh so close.
But the pitcher's fielding was really pretty gross.
And then Grandy hits the ground, just couldn't get a grip.
I was there in person, what a messy trip.

But alas, it's now over... they haven't got a chance
I can no longer watch, I sit in a trance
And wonder, what went wrong, why are they so bad?
It's actually sort of funny, no longer makes me mad.

The middle of May saw another sweep by the Royals,
Not so surprising this time, but still, the Royals?
What's the cure? Another position switch for Miggy?
Maybe this team's stil haunted by the ghost of Bobby Higgy.

So now there's nothing left to do,
But stare at losing bet slips and stew.
I'd like a refund... send me back all my cheese.
I'll be waiting for a check from you Mr. Dombrowski.